Better together

So I'm getting married this weekend, which means I'm switching off the internet for a few days and enjoying real life.

It's been a very stressful few months but I'm finally starting to really look forward to it.

So young!

You see, I wasn't ever that fussed about having a wedding...

Or getting married, for that matter...

But when we got engaged and I realised that someone wanted to marry ME... well that's a pretty nice thing.  And I realised that I just wanted to be married, and wanted to skip the wedding part.

This is my all time favourite photo of us. 

But once we'd set the date and committed to the wedding so many tiny little decisions presented themselves every day.  It's been like a second job, managing this crazy beast.  And it's not just black and white because people are involved.  And feelings.  And stress isn't just black or white either, it evolves into anxiety and in my case, a bit of depression.  It's been a journey, let me tell you.  And our wedding is a 'small' one... I can't imagine what it's like to organise anything bigger than 50 guests, or family less helpful or kind or loving than mine.

It's been a learning experience in having a 'vision' at the start of a project and learning that when humans are involved, things aren't going to turn out how your imagined but that what really matters is the people, not the vision. It's been a learning experience in having a support network for when you think you're ok but you're not ok.

But over the past few days when I've told various people I've run into that I'm getting married at the weekend and they ask am I nervous... I can't think of what to answer.  I'll take nervous any day! Heck, I've been through a lot of stress these past few months - enough to send me running to the doctors! And nervous is lovely in comparison!

So yea, I feel a giddy lovely nervousness.  I get to put on a pretty dress and have my makeup done and I get to see my handsome man all dressed up smart! I get to have all of my best people in one room together, and see them interacting.  I have spent the whole day on the phone to people today - that's more than I can say for a lot of the last year.

I've kept a lot of the wedding planning secret - mainly because until now everything has felt a bit - not fully done- and I'm just not THAT into the whole weddingness.

But I thought I'd share some photos of the Save The Dates I designed for us to send to our guests back in August.

It's all starting to feel real... and as I start to get a little nervous I can smile and think that all the hard work is finally paying off.  Goodness, I am excited!